Dissolving this sense of “a ME” is going to feel really uncomfortable.
It can sometimes feel like you’re being squeezed through something like an hourglass and it’s almost like there’s this pressure that feels overwhelming and painful and uncomfortable beyond words.
But it’s also so beautifully necessary if we want a different reality. If we want a different experience in our life from the one that we’ve been having over and over and over again. The cycle of our numbing comfortableness is OVER. It is getting more and more uncomfortable every day.
Have you ever had that feeling where the picture outside, being reality or ‘life’ (whatever you wish to call it), changes but it still feels somewhat the same? So, the holograph has changed, but the sensation within still remains? That’s the loop of the conditionings and that’s what creates this egoic sense of, “I am in this world” and “I am having these experiences” and “these thoughts are me” and “this body is me”. It is the ego overriding you and defining who you are with its identification patterns. It’s so apparent that the reality that this collective consciousness, called humanity, has been living in is in that very limited version of reality…of what is “believed” to be true.
What we are now witnessing is the dissolving of those limitations and that’s why there’s so much chaos in the world because all of the truths and energetics and frequencies that have been suppressed all this time are now coming to the surface.
There’s this sense of a ‘shake up’ and a ‘wake up’, in an “out-of-controllness”, in this world that these energies are trying to contain – but it’s uncontainable. If you’re going through an experience or if you’re currently in this state of, “what on earth is happening to me?” “Nothing makes sense anymore”…”everything feels out of control”….”there’s nothing I can hold onto because it all kind of just slips through my hands and I’m left right back where I started”… “All the things that I used to be able to do, don’t work anymore, cause they don’t feel right”…and “I can’t ignore this anymore”… “I can’t ignore this feeling that the shit that I’m doing, that doesn’t make me feel good – it doesn’t feel right anymore”. Please listen to this: it’s not saying that what you are experiencing is wrong, but it’s the awareness of this and that it doesn’t feel true anymore. It is a deep knowing within that we are more than this. We are seeing and feeling things differently now. You can feel the truth within your soul and it doesn’t feel true any longer.
Think of it as the dissolving of the distortions to see the truth of what’s actually going on. It is a waking up. That’s why the outside (physical reality) creates confusion and pain and chaos for us. It challenges us to use discernment and find what is true for our own self.
I know this may sound deep to many but what we haven’t understood is, it’s not what the image is that we are perceiving to ‘see’ and witness or become aware of. It’s what the image is representing to us (through our filter of seeing the world). What is it reflecting back to us? The energetics of it. What does it bring up? What do we feel within? In this sense of a system being a body…what sensations arise from the mirror of that experience or our reality?
There hasn’t been that understanding on a broad scale to learn about what our life here on earth really is because we go to school and we learn, we learn the pre-programmed or conditioned reality. We learn the limited reality. It is regurgitated over and over and over again. So there’s no sense of questioning, “is this actually true?” It’s just absorbed and then it’s lived by billions of us.
So now what we’ve been faced with is that the outside reality doesn’t work anymore because suddenly, the consciousness and the awareness is expanding collectively. There is a disconnect. We are breaking free. We are experiencing a conscious awareness and this can be exciting and scary at the same time. The veil is being lifted and it’s all being seen through now and our old life starts to make less and less sense. This version of reality that has been created makes no sense when you start to see through it. It’s almost hilarious how much we believed in the reality tunnel… that we thought was everything. We believed that it was our whole world.
So, if you feel like you’re in this hell of a confusing time, it’s OK. It’s perfection. It’s exactly where you’re meant to be… in this EXPANSIVE awareness. To be moving into something that you cannot know. Because the mind can only recreate what it knows.
If there is a sense of, “I can’t see anything beyond this moment”, that’s perfection! That’s exactly where you’re meant to be and that’s exactly the natural state, in a sense, to walk blindly. It is the natural state of being human, because then, we get to create from that free and creative space rather than recreating what’s already been created. We can create something entirely new. Something that we couldn’t even have thought to be possible, but, in order for that to happen, the consciousness and the awareness must expand and when that happens, other realities dissolve. When we have to move through that limited reality and crumble all of those programmed conditionings around (that we believe to be true and these conditionings constructed this limitation) this feels uncomfortable and can give us fear, suffering and pain.
I fully recognize your heart and I understand how painful it can be. It’s never disregarding any sensation as wrong or ignoring this expansion and growth. That’s why I say it’s painful. It’s important for you to recognize that, but also in that recognition, to see the beauty. You must see the magnificence. You must see the beauty of that pain. As Rumi said, “the cure for pain is in the pain”. There is beauty of that expansion that is happening and that wouldn’t happen if you remained where you were. There is beauty in feeling all those sensations. This is the beauty. It is not in that chaos and it is not that darkness…that can just feel like eternity.
It’s all in its perfection. So trust in it all.
It is all working out.
It’s already worked out.
It’s already done – everything is already done.
I love you.
